Storytelling

How to use music to elevate your YouTube scripts

March 31st, 2023

|

10

min read

Hey there,

Before we get started, I thought you might find this useful…

How I write a hook

I’ve been working with Ed for the last 6 months, writing material for his new channel, Creator Booth.

It finally launched this week, so I decided to break down the process I used to write the hook for this video…


I hope that gives you some insight! Alrighty, let’s get into it…

Video #1

Title: Will property prices keep falling?

Creator: Property Hub

Average % viewed: 68.5%

What worked

(1/2) Hook

One of the many lessons I’ve learned from Jake Thomas: negativity is a powerful attention-grabber.

(That sounds like an insult – but I’m not talking about his personality 😅)

This video opens with: negativity x broad appeal… because, whether you’re a homeowner or a tenant, house prices affect you.

Worrying stats are given instant crediblity with screenshots from financial reports.

And a Christopher Nolan-esque score sets the mood. I’M IN!

(2/2) CTA

This video’s CTA follows my formula from last week! (Not claiming credit of course – he made this video months ago!)

  1. Links back to current video (housing market is bad)
  2. Opens a curiosity gap (this could actually be good news for you, but only if you take advantage in the next 3-6 months)
  3. Delivers a CTA/Promise (click this video and I’ll tell you how to take advantage)

And… just look at that end screen CTR 😍

What to improve

(1/1) Rapid-fire jargon

This video is mostly accessible for anyone, but there’s a gradual decline during S4.

Remember, some people watching this video simply want to know:

  • Whether the value of their house will go down, or…
  • Whether house prices will go low enough for them to get on the ladder.

But suddenly being hit with “interest rates”, then “mortgage rates”, then “inflation”, then drawing a hypothesis from this about how this will affect the bank of England setting interest rates… it’s just a lot in 10 seconds.

While I’m still piecing this together, other stats and percentages are already flying my way. The result?

I’ve lost the plot 🤣

For as long as your viewer feels smart, you’ve got them hooked. But once they feel outside the loop… it’s hard to get them back in.

Takeaway

Your content can absolutely be aimed at non-beginners, but the target audience should be consistent.

If an otherwise beginner-friendly video suddenly goes jargon-heavy, retention will suffer.

Video #2

Title: We Played A MARIO KART KNOCKOFF!

Creator: Hulagh

Average % viewed: 43.1%

What worked

(1/1) Comedy

These two have really good chemistry and I found Hulagh’s increasing frustration hilarious, especially juxtaposed with his friend’s calm tone.

It got me thinking more broadly… why not try filming a video with a friend just to see how you vibe? Could be an interesting experiment.

What to improve

(1/2) Stakes

There’s nothing specific to keep us watching, other than seeing them race again and again.

It’s funny throughout, but nothing new is added.

The stakes need to be elevated in some way, beyond simply wondering who’s going to win.

Maybe it’s a best of 5 and the loser has a forefeit.

Or whoever wins the race gets a handicap in the next one.

Obviously, there’s no obligation to do this, but if we’re talking retention, continuous gameplay with nothing else underlying will graudally lose viewers.

(2/2) Clarity

Retention takes a bit of a dive in S2.

I felt that after 1min, we’d only seen about 10s of gameplay, and either side of that there was a little too much of the players talking over each other.

In conjunction with my first point about stakes, I basically wasn’t sure where the video was going or who I was about to spend the next 7 minutes with.

I would have liked to have been properly introduced to the additional player who pops up, and to have it made clearer what the end-goal of the video was. As it is, I felt a little outside the joke.

Takeaway

Even when a video is funny, the viewer needs to have a sense of where it’s going to stay fully engaged.

25% OFF The Retention Hub

The Retention Hub

Spring Sale [30% OFF]

See all my reviews in one place.

Filter 70+ breakdowns by niche, views, retention problem, average view duration (%) and more.

A much faster way to learn better storytelling, create more engaging content and grow your channel faster.

Get 30% OFF using the code SPRING30.


Learn More

Video #3

Title: The Tragic Downfall of Demi Lovato (What Went Wrong)

Creator: K-Jams

Average % viewed: 42.0%

What worked

(1/2) Pacing

This video is efficient in its information delivery and we don’t spend too long indulging in any one segment of Demi’s life.

But that’s not to say it’s all fast cuts and rushing. The video alternates between rapid-fire info, and slowing down to show interview clips/quotes, etc.

(2/2) Editing

B-Roll is often enhanced to amplify what’s going on in a given moment (TV static filter on news reports, etc).

This keeps the visuals varied and interesting.

What to improve

(1/2) Hook

The video opens with a little too much “telling”, rather than “showing”.

Although we see plenty of B-Roll as K-Jams lists Demi’s accolades, we rely on the voiceover to get a picture of what’s going on.

Compare this to one of Dodford’s documentaries…

The opening B-Roll is constructed in a way that gives us a vivid emotional picture, without the creator having to say a word.

This video about Donald Glover also uses another incredibly effective technique to heighten the emotion and capture our interest, that could elevate K-Jams’s content even further…

(2/2) Music

The music is currently incidental to the video… it’s there because it’s better than silence.

Most videos I review use music passively – that is, without any specific purpose.

But there’s a reason most great movies also have incredible scores. Music’s ability to heighen our emotions and reactions should never be understated, even on YouTube.

Key moments in this video could have been accentuated with a more deliberate use of music.

Takeaway

Most creators use music passively. Try using it with purpose to accentuate key moments of the video.

That’s all for this week!

Speak soon,

George 👋

Subscribe to the Newsletter

Join 3000+ creators receiving quick, actionable scriptwriting tips every Friday.

Thank you! Your submission has been received!
Oops! Something went wrong while submitting the form.

Create more engaging videos with simple, actionable scriptwriting tips.

Join 4,000+ scriptwriting nerds reading “Write On Time”. Insights from writing for multi-million subscriber YouTubers sent to your inbox every Friday.

Thank you! Your submission has been received!
Oops! Something went wrong while submitting the form.